Friday, March 01, 2013

Dysfunctional to a T

If this actually ever comes to something, we are going to have the most dysfunctional non-relationship ever.

I don't smile when I get your texts, sometimes I even groan but mostly I laugh and not in a good way. You infuriate me with every second word that comes out of your mouth (or out of your fingers as we're texting). Even just talking to you drives me towards your ex-best friend because he's just not you.

We've been talking again for all of 5 days and already had a blow up. I know that this morning, we were both acting like it never happened but you did hurt me by what you said last night and I haven't decided yet if I'm over it or not. We established that rule number 1 of this thing is COMMUNICATION and I'm already not telling you things.

Part of me knows, knows, this will not work, because this stuff never works, they make movies and TV show plots about how it never works, but I want to try it anyway. I only hope that it doesn't ever result in hurting him. Another thing I haven't told you about and won't unless something happens because I'm being selfish and I'm afraid it's going to backfire in a big way but it's not stopping me anyway.

I'm writing a pro-con list only with you, I don't know what is a pro and what is a con because everything that's bad about you is what I think will be good for me right now.

I really don't know how this is going to go, there are so many obstacles and I don't know if it's worth trying to find a way past them all.

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