Drafts and Therapy

You would be amazed (or perhaps you wouldn't) how many blog posts I start or ideas I get that I never end up actually publishing. The notes folder on my phone is full of them, scraps of paper litter my desk with ideas jotted down in a hurry, not to mention the ZoHan drafts folder.

Some of them I can't get the wording right, some of them I lose interest in, some of them too much time passes between inspiration and publication, some of them are too close to the chest for me to reveal, even if it is just to Hannah.

In a way though, just the act of writing them down and thinking about the topic in question is enough. I use this blog as a type of therapy (for want of a better word) 'Essentials of the ZoHan Life' is the friend that always listens and never interrupts and just lets you vent your feelings whether they be about the stupidity of the world, the cute guy you saw at the coffee shop or One Direction's haircuts. And it's guilt free venting, I don't have to worry that I'm not listening enough or talking too much, or acting unconcerned about their problems and being selfish. Not that I often feel this way with my friends, I have amazing, beautiful friends who would always be happy to listen to me if I wanted or needed them to but some times I worry that I'm talking too much and not listening enough.

For some reason I have an inherent fear of being selfish and inconsiderate. I still am at times, I'm sure, but I try to think about things from the other person's point of view, imagine what life is like in their shoes. Of course it doesn't always work like that and sometimes I do steal the last bit of chocolate or cut in front of people but I do try to imagine how they see it and how their life has lead them to this point.

This post has digressed so totally from its starting point I can't even see the beginning anymore but, like I said, therapy. I write and words come out, sometimes it's not what I had intended at all but they're often the times I like the most.